It’s okay to feel discouraged when you open that rejection letter from an audition…again.
It's okay to feel despair that no matter how diligent you are with your diet, how often you turn down what you want in lieu of what you should eat...you still can’t get the perfect ballet body.
It’s okay to feel cheated when the casting list goes up...and your name isn’t where you thought it should be.
It’s okay to feel jealous when the girl standing next to you at barre does a seemingly effortless développé up to her ear...while you grit your teeth just to keep your leg at 90 degrees.
It’s okay to feel hopeless when dripping with sweat, muscles burning, and lungs gasping for air...you still can’t execute the variation flawlessly.
It’s okay to feel disappointed when you watch a video of a performance that you thought went well...only to discover all your imperfections on camera.
It’s okay to feel frustrated at your life’s circumstances (the fact that you weren’t put in a prestigious ballet school at a young age or had to support yourself with other jobs while trying to make it as a dancer)...knowing others had an easier path laid out before them.
It’s okay to feel rage that no matter how hard you try, how bad you want it, how dedicated you are, how much pain you endure…you are never going to be able to compete with the thoroughbreds. You’re never going to be the “best.”
Let yourself fully feel the pain, hurt, jealousy, rage. Acknowledge all those dark emotions. Lay all that junk out on the table. Get it out of your head. The world is unfair. Life is unfair. And you don’t always get what you want…no matter how deserving you may be.
Now that you have taken out the trash, cleansed yourself of all your emotional junk, you should feel empty. And now you can begin the rebuilding process. Start fresh, recreate your self & your reality from a clean slate. Build yourself back up without all that emotional garbage clogging up your system, getting in the way of your enjoyment of life and your art.
How do you start rebuilding?
Try this: get on the floor in a simple plank position, not with the intent of killing yourself with a workout…but with the intent of getting in your body, feeling your strength, recognizing your power.
Feel your breath infusing life-giving force into every cell.
Feel the tingle in your muscles as they rise to meet the physical challenge before them.
Feel your heart pumping through every inch of your body.
Feel your power circulating in your core, radiating out through your limbs, & grounding into the earth.
Remember you are the only one in control of this body. You control how it moves, where it goes, what it experiences.
Remember how passionate you are about your ballet. Realize that you should feel grateful for this passion. Most people go through their whole lives endlessly searching for something to be this passionate about…and never find it.
Remember how lucky you are to have a source that you can continually grow and improve in. Something that encourages you to be more…and that allows you to leave your unique artistic mark behind.
In the larger picture of this world with all the tragedy and struggles out there, if you are able to pursue something like ballet…you’ve got no problems. Really. Your art is supposed to fill you with hope, possibilities, beauty, inspiration. Stop using your art to destroy yourself. And start using it to elevate your experience on this earth.
It's as simple as detoxing the bad emotions & filling yourself with the good ones.